Should Working Moms Get a Free Pass?
I was a bit disturbed by that conversation. I didn't expect special treatment, but I was taken aback when I thought about how my employer might react to an occasional crisis. While I do think employees should be family friendly, allowing both working mothers and fathers occasional time off to tend to their children's needs, I believe that when one is at work, he or she should give that his or or her full attention.
Apparently not everyone thinks this way. Yesterday, a teacher friend of mine and I were talking about how some teachers do a stupendous job while others do the bare minimum. She attributed some of the disparity to a difference between the genders of the teachers. Female teachers, she explained, often have families to care for while male teachers have wives at home to care for their kids. Therefore we shouldn't expect female teachers to do as much as male teachers. For example a male teacher might stay late to help a child, while a female teacher can't. And don't even think of a female teacher helping a child during lunch hour because that's when she has to do her paperwork. After all, she can't bring it home. So, in other words, she was advising me to lower my expectations for female teachers.
As someone who has always felt that men and women should be treated the same by their employers, I was astounded by this. Sure it's true that many women shoulder the bulk of family responsibilities in spite of also holding down important jobs, but I think that is something that needs to be settled between a husband and wife not between an employer and employee or a teacher and the parent of a student. Employers, I feel, should be flexible as long as employers do their jobs well, but this doesn't include lowering standards. If we make excuses for working mothers, can others then argue that women should not be paid as much as men or be eligible for the same promotions because they can't be expected to do as much? I find that very upsetting.
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Comments
When it comes to quality of work, moms don’t deserve a ‘free pass.’ However, there are times when an employer can not treat a working mom as it would a single employee. For example, if emergencies arise with children where a working mother would obviously need to leave work early to resolve. Also, if the working parent is single, the employer cannot expect overtime from her, because daycare and school have strict standards when it comes to child pickup.
WHAT??? Of course the employer can treat a working mom as it would a single employee…if a family emergency arises whether it be a child or an elderly parent, both employees will need to set their own priorities and determine if it is really necessary to leave work. It is the mother’s responsibility to ensure the “strict standards” that are set by the day care/school are met WITHOUT disrupting the work day! I agree with the author, I find it very upsetting that some women use being a mother as an excuse to gain sympathy from the employer and expect preferential treatment because they have kids…oh and by the way, I’m a PROUD WORKING MOTHER OF THREE SCHOOL AGE CHILDREN!!! I work through Spring Breaks and I use personal leave when an emergency arises, as do my Non-parenting counterparts!!! I do work overtime when needed and I ensure my children are picked up on time!! I guess personal responsibility is something I value!